Book Review

Breaking Dawn by Stephenie Meyer
Synopsis: Um...Endless love, broken hearts, clueless parents and a mediocre heroine. Not to mention more pools of golden, shimmering topaz in his ever-loving eyes. Bleck.

Readability: Easy. I'm glad it's over.
Predictability: Ok. I had PARTS figured out, but scene after scene, I could NOT believe where the author was taking me. This one just got weirder and weirder for me. I would have predicted the end, but I would NOT have expected the roller coaster to get there.
Couldn't Put it Down Factor: 700 pages this time. I read fast just to get it over with. One-third of the way through Breaking Dawn, I hit my limit. I kept reading just to find out what was going to happen.

Recommend it?: If you're going to read the first three, you pretty much have to read this one. Just don't be mad at me when you feel like you wasted a week and almost 3000 pages of your life.
Three out of Five stars. For the first half of the book. I'm still impressed with the author. Her imagination farrrrr exceeds my own. I never would have been able to come up with this kind of story line.

Can I just go on record as saying that Bella, the heroine, is a dullard? I felt like I was leading Bella around by the nose through all four books. Let me know if you feel the same way.

All in all, I enjoyed myself and haven't been this enthused to spend my time reading in quite a while, but I think I jumped in head first with the Twilight series, and let myself expect too much.

Just like most of my college boyfriends. (Excepting Richard, obviously.)

p.s. I write this knowing full well that MANY readers will disagree with my review. So sue me.

***Spoiler alert! There are spoilers in the comments section of this post. Sorry if it's too late for you already.***

Book Review

Eclipse by Stephenie Meyer

Synopsis: More star-cros'd. More reluctant monsters. More love lost. Ohhhhhhhhhh, Jacob. [Tear.] (That last comment was for those of you who've read the series. You know what I mean.)
Readability: Easy. I enjoyed this one the most so far. By a mile.

Predictability: I went from guessing the plot lines in the first novel, to being pleasantly surprised in the second to not knowing ANYTHING in this third. LOVE that!

Couldn't Put it Down Factor: Yet another 600 pages in under 12 hours. I even tried to pace myself this time so I wouldn't run out of reading material. I couldn't stop. I couldn't focus on my real life. I was completely enthralled in Eclipse. (I waited to post a review so that you wouldn't think I was too crazy. It's probably too late for that.)
Recommend it?: Doi. Read the others first. Please.

Four out of Five stars. I have to say, I'm impressed with Stephenie Meyer. I thought I was too clever for this silly vampire love story, but I am completely, irrevocably in love. It's too late for me. Save yourselves. Or don't. Enjoyyyyyyyyy Edward's smoldering eyes and Jacob's passionate growls. (I'm so not kidding around here.)

World's Hardest Watermelon.

Book Review

New Moon by Stephenie Meyer
Synopsis: Star-cros'd lovers. Poor Edward is a reluctant vampire. Bella is even more in love with her eternally damned boyfriend, and her relationship with long-time family friend, Jacob Black develops. I don't dare say anything else...

Readability: This book was really difficult and challenging. Just kidding.

Predictability: This one was a little more unexpected for me. I really wasn't sure how this one would turn out. That's always a pleasure.
Couldn't Put it Down Factor: Another 600 pages in under 12 hours. I'm sorry Shirley.

Recommend it?: Obviously. But not before you read Twilight.
Four out of Five stars. I liked this one better, but I am star-cros'd myself. I just don't know who to cheer for anymore. Sigh... I have to go. I have more reading to do.

208

Is not wisdom found among the aged? Does not long life bring understanding?
-Job 12:12

The cold fluorescent lights didn't match the overheated ER suite.
"Shirley? Are they taking me upstairs soon?"
"Yeah, Ma. Soon. They're waiting to hear from the doctor."
"Will it be an odd-numbered room?"
The nurse with the purple glasses bustled through the curtain. "Ok, sweetie, ready to go upstairs?"
"Is it an odd-numbered room?"
"I think so," said the nurse. "Don't worry. It's not 208."
"Please make it an odd-numbered room. Just not room 208."
"Why not 208?" I asked, knowing the answer as soon as the question was out of my mouth.
"That's where her husband died."
And just like that I felt like a stranger in my own family.

Book Review

*

Twilight by Stephenie Meyer

Synopsis: Edward Cullen and Bella Swan fall irrevocably in love the instant their eyes meet across the Forks High School cafeteria. Their love is heart stopping. and filled with many sorrowful glances, pained expressions and "pools of love in his golden eyes." (I made that up, but basically, it's true.)There's just one problem: Edward is a VAMPIRE!

Readability: Easy peasy. In fact, the first 20 pages, I thought, "How do people get this dribble published?" And...the rest is history.

Predictability: Oh, well...you know. It's a high school vampire love story. What do you expect? Really.

Couldn't Put it Down Factor: Could. Not. Stop. Reading. There is something SO magnetic about this book that I really and truly couldn't put it down. (I'm so ashamed! Don't tell my lit professors!) I read 600 pages in 12 hours. I would have read faster if I didn't have a husband and daughter ifyouknowwhatimean.
Recommend it?: Yes. Yes. YES. I'm ashamed of how emphatically I want you to read this book. I LOVED it.

Three out of Five stars--because of the poor writing. One star for Edward. {sigh} One for a really exciting story line. And the last for the fact that there are THREE MORE BOOKS!!!

*Please note that the photo accompanying this book review isn't the book cover, like I usually post. It's a photo of Edward Cullen. My boyfriend. I haven't had the hots for a literary character like this since...well, ever.

Sigh...

50

Happy Birthday (weekend), Mom!!!

I love you very much.

p.s. You are very good at staying out of the camera's way. This is the ONLY photo I have of you holding SJ since Christmas!

Home Improvements

Richard, his bother, Jeff and his girlfriend, Sam (Jeff's girlfriend, not Rich's...) painted our fence last weekend.
I'm only sorry I didn't get a photo of my three little Tom Sawyers out there! They worked so hard and did such a great job!

Before.

After.

Doesn't it look nice??

Note to self:
Beware of junker cars with Nascar stickers in their windows.
Those guys got nothin' to lose.

GPS

Mom: I found one of SJ's pacifiers.
Erin: I'll send her over to get it.
Mom: How will she be arriving?
Erin: By walker.
Mom: Be sure to send the GPS.

Look what I did today!

Surprisingly, it didn't hurt as much as I anticipated it would. The worst part was hearing the needle crunch through my flesh.
I'm pretty excited about it.
Yes, that's blood.
I'm such a badass.

Yesterday I completely forgot to check the blogs.
WHAT?!
I know, right?

What? How? Why? How?

I just picked up a po.ta.to off the bathroom floor.

I like coming home to this.

HMD*

Happy Mother's Day, blogworld!
Your Mommyblogs lift me up every day.
I think you are wonderful mothers and I am proud to call you my friends.
If we were headed into battle, this is what our General would say:
Wipe those noses!
Make those meals!
Write those checks!
Drive those minivans!
Hold those hands!
Blow those kisses!
Snuggle those sniffles!
Rub those backs!
Sing those songs!
Pick up those messes!
Give those baths!
Pray those prayers!
RAISE UP THOSE DISCIPLES!!!

Onward and upward, fellow Mommies.
Onward and upward.
We are in this together.


*Not Her Majesty's Dreamboat.

My name is Erin...

It's 2am and I'm shopping for purses on eBay.
I can't hide it anymore. I have a purse sickness. An addiction.
I. Can't. Stop.
I bought my first Coach purse my senior year of high school (gray, shoulder strap, magnetic closure) and since then I have lost count of how many handbags I own. I'm not kidding. Instead of counting sheep, I count purses.
There is just something about that soft, fragrant leather that I am completely unable to walk away from.
[Leeeaaaaathhhhhherrrrrrrr...]
Where was I?
While we were in Florida, we went to the Coach store, and many handbags were an additional 50% off.
I don't mind telling you, interweb, I cried.
I ran around the store with no less than seven purses on my arms, modeling for the mirror, asking strangers which ones they liked best. It was better than DisneyWorld.
Lately, I've been dipping my e-toes in the REALLY expensive purses. The Fendi and Louis Vuitton's out there. (Did you know that only one store in Minnesota carries Louis Vuitton?)
I'm willing to start small. Buy vintage. We can make this work.

Other people drink. Smoke. Snort. Eat. Gamble.
Some people shop. For purses.
Someone help me.


p.s. My bags have names.
p.p.s. I am only admitting this to you all now, because you know me well enough by now to know that my purse addiction doesn't mean I'm a jerk. Or materialistic. Or a snot. Really. I just can't help myself.
p.p.p.s. StoptalkingErin.

p.p.p.p.s. Will you still be my friend?

That ain't right.

Here we are going home from Hudson on I-94.
Methinks it may be time for a new compass.

Of course it rained today...

...on the day I worked so hard to straighten my hair.
Having long hair is a new experience for me.
It's very easy to just put it in a mommy-tail and go.
Does anybody have any tips for a pretty, mommy-friendly, long-hair-challenged gal?

CrunchSplat!

This weekend, Mom and I were running around and I had to stop at McDonald's to return a movie to the Redbox.
We decided to get a treat while we were there. We settled on our order before I ran in.
Erin: I'm going to get a coffee thingy with whipped cream.
Mom: I want a small iced tea and a small ice cream cone.
Erin: Ok, be right back.
Mom: Can you carry all of that?
Erin: Mom, I'm a mom now. I can do anything.

Well, you can guess what happened to her cone.

Congratulations, Richard!

Dear Richard,

You cannot fathom how proud I am of you.

God will bless your hard work, my love.

I love you so very much and respect the man you are and the man God is leading you to be.

All my love,

E.

Note to self:
Shortening your bra straps brings your breasticles back up where they belong.

(Much like love that lifts us up where we belong...)