Erin: Shirley, do you want fish sticks for dinner?
Shirley [looks at Fishmael]: What?! Mama, Fishmael is not a stick! You silly goofy.
Erin [sweating bullets]: Chicken, then! Let's have chicken.
Friday, February 18, 2011
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
SHIRLEY! NINETY-SEVEN! GO!
Shirley and I had a very stern talk yesterday about touching outlets. Today, Baby Richard and I had the same talk. Now Shirley feels smug and superior while Baby's feelings are hurt.
I can't help but feel like I'm repeating myself an awful lot. Not to mention, if Shirley is still inclined to touch outlets, and I'm just starting to teach Richard now...I may be saying this for a long time. Follow me?
I am thinking of writing these oft-repeated mom-isms down, almost like a playbook.
For instance,
Rule #1: Obey the first time you are asked.
Rule #2: No whining.
Rule #3: Don't hit.
Rule #4: Don't touch outlets.
So on and so forth...
Then, when I'm in the middle of something, I can just call out, "Shirley! SEVENTEEN!" And she'll jump up and make dinner.
I can't help but feel like I'm repeating myself an awful lot. Not to mention, if Shirley is still inclined to touch outlets, and I'm just starting to teach Richard now...I may be saying this for a long time. Follow me?
I am thinking of writing these oft-repeated mom-isms down, almost like a playbook.
For instance,
Rule #1: Obey the first time you are asked.
Rule #2: No whining.
Rule #3: Don't hit.
Rule #4: Don't touch outlets.
So on and so forth...
Then, when I'm in the middle of something, I can just call out, "Shirley! SEVENTEEN!" And she'll jump up and make dinner.
Friday, February 11, 2011
Call me Fishmael.
Meet the newest member of our family, Fishmael.
We adopted him almost two weeks ago, and he has been a joy and delight ever since! He is a Siamese Fighting Fish or Betta Splendens, and must be in his tank alone, because he won't back down from a fight! He follows my finger all along his tank and puffs himself up as if he's really going to get me.
I really felt inclined to get a Betta because they are so abused in pet stores. There are many misconceptions about Betta fish, because they are a very hardy fish and thereby hard to kill. They essentially have a lung that they use in addition to their gills and take a lot of oxygen from the surface of the water. Because of this, they are able to live in putrified, polluted, ammonia-water long after any other fish would have died. Because of this, many people think they can thrive in small bowls of water with little or no oxygen, when what really happens is that they burn to death in their own ammonia waste products.
Another common false belief is that Bettas can live in a bowl underneath a water plant and will eat off its roots. This also is not true. Bettas need protein to survive, and a plant offers no protein, so they slowly starve to death in planted bowls, in slightly less disgusting water. A starved Betta will nibble at the roots of any plant, looking for food, but don't be deceived! A Betta needs clean, oxygenated water and a high-protein diet in teeny, tiny portions. I am so happy to offer a better home to this beautiful creature of God.
Anyway, meet Fishmael. :)
We adopted him almost two weeks ago, and he has been a joy and delight ever since! He is a Siamese Fighting Fish or Betta Splendens, and must be in his tank alone, because he won't back down from a fight! He follows my finger all along his tank and puffs himself up as if he's really going to get me.
I really felt inclined to get a Betta because they are so abused in pet stores. There are many misconceptions about Betta fish, because they are a very hardy fish and thereby hard to kill. They essentially have a lung that they use in addition to their gills and take a lot of oxygen from the surface of the water. Because of this, they are able to live in putrified, polluted, ammonia-water long after any other fish would have died. Because of this, many people think they can thrive in small bowls of water with little or no oxygen, when what really happens is that they burn to death in their own ammonia waste products.
Another common false belief is that Bettas can live in a bowl underneath a water plant and will eat off its roots. This also is not true. Bettas need protein to survive, and a plant offers no protein, so they slowly starve to death in planted bowls, in slightly less disgusting water. A starved Betta will nibble at the roots of any plant, looking for food, but don't be deceived! A Betta needs clean, oxygenated water and a high-protein diet in teeny, tiny portions. I am so happy to offer a better home to this beautiful creature of God.
Anyway, meet Fishmael. :)
Thursday, February 10, 2011
And then I broke out in cold sweat.
Shirley: Daddy, I can have more chicken?
Richard: Sure, but this isn't chicken. This is...
Erin: Don't do it.
Rich: ...PIG!
SJ: What?
Erin: Nooooo...not tonight.
SJ: Daddy! This is meat.
Rich: No, it's pig.
Erin: Richard! Stop it! NOT. TONIGHT.
SJ: Daddy, stop. You silly.
Rich: Ok, Shirley, you're right. It's chicken.
SJ: No, Daddy. There's no animals. This is meat!
Erin: Yes! It's meat.
Rich: It's meat.
SJ: Yummmmmy. I can have dip?
Richard: Sure, but this isn't chicken. This is...
Erin: Don't do it.
Rich: ...PIG!
SJ: What?
Erin: Nooooo...not tonight.
SJ: Daddy! This is meat.
Rich: No, it's pig.
Erin: Richard! Stop it! NOT. TONIGHT.
SJ: Daddy, stop. You silly.
Rich: Ok, Shirley, you're right. It's chicken.
SJ: No, Daddy. There's no animals. This is meat!
Erin: Yes! It's meat.
Rich: It's meat.
SJ: Yummmmmy. I can have dip?
Wednesday, February 09, 2011
Vision Board: Better late than never!
At the beginning of the year, Lauren and her co-workers had an assignment to create vision boards that show their goals and aspirations for the new year, and share them in a staff meeting.
Instead of grumbling about the assignment, Lauren threw herself in to the project and loved every minute of it. (This is one of Lauren's most admirable qualities, if you ask me.)
She was so inspired by this project that she helped me make a vision board for 2011.
I admit, I thought it was sort of silly, but once we got going, I really enjoyed myself! I am proud of my vision board and hope I reach all of my goals represented on it.
Click to enlarge.
It was a really fun project, and very fun to see my goals on paper. If you have specific goals for the new year, maybe you could make one! If you do, be sure to post a comment and share it with me.
Saturday, February 05, 2011
Quiet Time
I was reading in The Bible the other day about a prophecy regarding a great contest expected to take place in about the year 2011.
The prophecy read something about how God had ordained the outcome of a contest watched by the entire world whereby a race of giant men covered in green with yellow markings and cages on their heads surrounded by people wearing dairy products triumphed in something called The Great Bowl XLV over a tribe from the east who were all dressed in black and were surrounded by a wild an unwashed group of people waving rags.
After the contest was over, darkness covered the face of the earth over all the area of the tribe from the east but the sun shined bright over the land of the tribe from the west. So bright, in fact, that the ice and snow melted and the land was eternally freed from the ice prison that held it until now. There was rejoicing in the land of the green men but there was bitterness, weeping, wailing, and gnashing of teeth in the land of the black covered men. God was happy for the green men and sad for the black covered men, but he saw that His work was good and that justice had been done.
He then turned the following year to smite a tribe called Vikings.
I can’t remember the reference but I’m sure I read it in Isaiah. What do you suppose it means?
The prophecy read something about how God had ordained the outcome of a contest watched by the entire world whereby a race of giant men covered in green with yellow markings and cages on their heads surrounded by people wearing dairy products triumphed in something called The Great Bowl XLV over a tribe from the east who were all dressed in black and were surrounded by a wild an unwashed group of people waving rags.
After the contest was over, darkness covered the face of the earth over all the area of the tribe from the east but the sun shined bright over the land of the tribe from the west. So bright, in fact, that the ice and snow melted and the land was eternally freed from the ice prison that held it until now. There was rejoicing in the land of the green men but there was bitterness, weeping, wailing, and gnashing of teeth in the land of the black covered men. God was happy for the green men and sad for the black covered men, but he saw that His work was good and that justice had been done.
He then turned the following year to smite a tribe called Vikings.
I can’t remember the reference but I’m sure I read it in Isaiah. What do you suppose it means?
Thursday, February 03, 2011
Someone should do a study.
Is the concept of "sleeping through the night" an American thing? Do African women in huts get up two or three times a night with their children? How about Cambodian women? Turkish or Japanese women? Do they embrace the fact that they will never sleep again once they have children? What about Irish women? Is six hours of sleep in two-hour increments a gift to them? Iran? Mexico? Idaho?
Everyone I know has one goal: sleeping through the night.
"Is he sleeping through the night?" "Oh, she sleeps through! Good for you!" "How often is he up in the night?" "If you [do this] she will sleep through the night." These are all very common phrases to the parents of a new baby...in MY culture.
What I want to know is: are we the weirdos? Is this a major topic of conversation for mommies in other countries and cultures?
I'm just saying if this is my life, I at least want to belong to a culture where everybody else feels like shit, too.
Everyone I know has one goal: sleeping through the night.
"Is he sleeping through the night?" "Oh, she sleeps through! Good for you!" "How often is he up in the night?" "If you [do this] she will sleep through the night." These are all very common phrases to the parents of a new baby...in MY culture.
What I want to know is: are we the weirdos? Is this a major topic of conversation for mommies in other countries and cultures?
I'm just saying if this is my life, I at least want to belong to a culture where everybody else feels like shit, too.
Monday, January 31, 2011
The Big D: You do the math.
I take 20,000iu of vitamin D per day. (That may seem like a lot, but it works for me.)
I am almost out of my current bottle, so last night I stopped at Wal-Mart to pick up some more. I didn't think to look at the capsule dosages and just grabbed a double pack (on sale!).
When I got home I realized that I bought two bottles of 1,000iu capsules.
That works out to 20 pills per day.
So not gonna happen. I better find my receipt.
I am almost out of my current bottle, so last night I stopped at Wal-Mart to pick up some more. I didn't think to look at the capsule dosages and just grabbed a double pack (on sale!).
When I got home I realized that I bought two bottles of 1,000iu capsules.
That works out to 20 pills per day.
So not gonna happen. I better find my receipt.
Friday, January 28, 2011
The Potatoes have eyes!
Daddy has so defiled Mrs. Potato Head that Shirley will not
*will not*
touch her.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Are you ready for some football?
At lunch today with a friend, I was waiting my turn in line listening to two men talk about the Super Bowl.
An older man turned to me and said, "I am not a sports fan. I don't even know what they're talking about!"
I said, "Oh, man. I'm sorry. You don't even speak the language, do you?"
He laughed and agreed with me. He listened to the men again for a second and said, "Every year it surprises me that this REALLY means something to some people."
I didn't know what to say...on the one hand, I wanted to appear empathetic, but at the same time...it means something to me. Now, I'm not saying the outcome of the Super Bowl has a whole lot of impact on my life, but I do care!
Who woulda thunk it?
An older man turned to me and said, "I am not a sports fan. I don't even know what they're talking about!"
I said, "Oh, man. I'm sorry. You don't even speak the language, do you?"
He laughed and agreed with me. He listened to the men again for a second and said, "Every year it surprises me that this REALLY means something to some people."
I didn't know what to say...on the one hand, I wanted to appear empathetic, but at the same time...it means something to me. Now, I'm not saying the outcome of the Super Bowl has a whole lot of impact on my life, but I do care!
Who woulda thunk it?
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Book Review
Garden Spells by Sarah Addison Allen
Synopsis: Claire Waverly has a nice life set up for herself inside the walls of her garden, using the plants inside for her hugely successful catering company. When her sister shows up with a five-year-old daughter, after being gone for ten years, her security is threatened.
Readability: Super quick and easy. Imaginative and fun, though, so not boring.
Synopsis: Claire Waverly has a nice life set up for herself inside the walls of her garden, using the plants inside for her hugely successful catering company. When her sister shows up with a five-year-old daughter, after being gone for ten years, her security is threatened.
Readability: Super quick and easy. Imaginative and fun, though, so not boring.
Predictability: Well...I knew how it would end, but I didn't know how we would get there. I have to say, I wish the author hadn't wrapped things up so...predictably. A little more imagination and a few more chapters, and this really could have been a masterpiece. It felt like Allen didn't want to work that hard. That being said, she laid out the puzzle pieces in a way that I could see them, but couldn't put them together without her help. ...Ok, truth be told, I could have, and I would have done it differently, but that didn't keep me from devouring every single word.
Couldn't Put it Down Factor: I read the whole thing in five hours. I LOVED it. Loved every word. Total, pure enjoyment.
Recommend it?: YES! Yes! YES! Be warned, however, there is limited vocabulary, and some sex and some violence. Nothing compared to the last Grafton novel I read, though. There are a couple pretty grown up scenes in this one, though, folks. That being said, I LOVED this book. I can't wait to read SAA's other novels.
Four out of five stars. Loved it for its creative context, but wish she had taken it another step further. Left me wanting more, but only because I enjoyed it so much.
Couldn't Put it Down Factor: I read the whole thing in five hours. I LOVED it. Loved every word. Total, pure enjoyment.
Recommend it?: YES! Yes! YES! Be warned, however, there is limited vocabulary, and some sex and some violence. Nothing compared to the last Grafton novel I read, though. There are a couple pretty grown up scenes in this one, though, folks. That being said, I LOVED this book. I can't wait to read SAA's other novels.
Four out of five stars. Loved it for its creative context, but wish she had taken it another step further. Left me wanting more, but only because I enjoyed it so much.
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Well, we DO have the biggest brains.
If humans are truly superior mammals, how come you never see a puppy, baby seal, or even a baby monkey wedged under the couch, screaming bloody murder with his feelings crushed because he's gotten himself into another fine mess? I've also (personally) never seen a kitten try with all its might, for days and days, to eat the vacuum cleaner or the bathroom garbage can.
I'm just thinking out loud here.
I'm just thinking out loud here.
Friday, December 10, 2010
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
A Conspiracy
Have you ever noticed that the cream cheese to bagel ratio is never equal?
There is always more than enough cream cheese in the package to cover the six bagels, but not enough to cover twelve bagels.
I'm just saying.
There is always more than enough cream cheese in the package to cover the six bagels, but not enough to cover twelve bagels.
I'm just saying.
Sunday, November 28, 2010
A Week of Thanks: The Finish Line
On Thursday of this week, I was incredibly thankful for a lot of things. For my family, for my friends, for my sweet, beautiful children. But more specifically, I was most thankful for finishing a race. In September, I did a lot of research about local fitness centers. Who had the most to offer? Who had the best price? Who would best meet my needs? I got all my questions answered and discussed with Richard. I am so thankful that he agreed that I could sign up to join the gym. Since then, I have worked hard, training for the Turkey Day 5K in Minneapolis. Again, I am thankful for Richard's generosity, because any time I was at the gym meant I wasn't at home.
So, on Thursday morning, I got up very (VERY) early and rode down to Minneapolis with my sweet friend, Sarah. Oh, how thankful I am for her! We have been friends for 24 years. She has been a part of my life for my whole life. And together, we "ran" 3.1 miles together in the freezing cold. What a joy!
On Friday, I was thankful for friendships once again. Mom, Naomi and I went out with the crazed shoppers on Black Friday. None of us spent a whole lot, but going on an adventure of that kind with two of my best friends is more than I could hope for. What's more? I bought new jeans. New. Jeans. Catch my drift? Wahoo! All that time at the gym is paying off!
Today, the finish line for the Week of Thanks, I am so thankful for my loving family. My sister worked so hard to prepare a gorgeous meal for all of us. (And most of it was gluten-free!) We got to spend precious time together laughing and talking, and watching Shirley show off.
So, the Week of Thanks comes to a close. I will try not to stop being thankful. You do the same. Deal? Deal.
Enter his gates with thanksgiving
and his courts with praise;
give thanks to him and praise his name.
-Psalm 100:4
So, on Thursday morning, I got up very (VERY) early and rode down to Minneapolis with my sweet friend, Sarah. Oh, how thankful I am for her! We have been friends for 24 years. She has been a part of my life for my whole life. And together, we "ran" 3.1 miles together in the freezing cold. What a joy!
On Friday, I was thankful for friendships once again. Mom, Naomi and I went out with the crazed shoppers on Black Friday. None of us spent a whole lot, but going on an adventure of that kind with two of my best friends is more than I could hope for. What's more? I bought new jeans. New. Jeans. Catch my drift? Wahoo! All that time at the gym is paying off!
Today, the finish line for the Week of Thanks, I am so thankful for my loving family. My sister worked so hard to prepare a gorgeous meal for all of us. (And most of it was gluten-free!) We got to spend precious time together laughing and talking, and watching Shirley show off.
So, the Week of Thanks comes to a close. I will try not to stop being thankful. You do the same. Deal? Deal.
Enter his gates with thanksgiving
and his courts with praise;
give thanks to him and praise his name.
-Psalm 100:4
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
A Week of Thanks: Wednesday
Today I am thankful that I was able to make it to the grocery store before the snow started flying and everybody got off of work. I would not want to be out in that madness right now!
I am also thankful for a husband who provides and enables me to host a dinner for our family. I'm looking forward to having them over to celebrate the first leg of our Thanksgiving weekend.
Oh give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; for his steadfast love endures forever! 1 Chronicles 16:34
I am also thankful for a husband who provides and enables me to host a dinner for our family. I'm looking forward to having them over to celebrate the first leg of our Thanksgiving weekend.
Oh give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; for his steadfast love endures forever! 1 Chronicles 16:34
A Week of Thanks: Tuesday
Yesterday I was thankful for forgiveness, Coca-Cola, and vitamin D capsules.
Take from that what you will.
Take from that what you will.
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Monday, November 22, 2010
A Week of Thanks: Sunday
Tonight, I am thankful for all the hard work I did last week to get ready for our company to come this weekend. Because of that hard work, my house is still clean enough for me to relax and veg out after our fun, albeit exhausting weekend.
I know that doesn't seem like much, but an evening of reprieve from the daily uphill battle is greatly appreciated.
Looking forward to the week ahead.
I am also very thankful for new friendships made, old friendships nurtured, and grandparents who will sit in our living room until three o'clock in the morning because we are stuck in an ice storm on the 35W bridge.
I know that doesn't seem like much, but an evening of reprieve from the daily uphill battle is greatly appreciated.
Looking forward to the week ahead.
I am also very thankful for new friendships made, old friendships nurtured, and grandparents who will sit in our living room until three o'clock in the morning because we are stuck in an ice storm on the 35W bridge.
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