Previous experience not required.

Several times in the last six or so years I've really gotten slammed by other Christian women with regard to my new (to me) roles as wife and mother.
I remember very distinctly an excited conversation I was having with a "more experienced" sister-woman-friend about shopping for engagement rings with Richard. Another "more experienced" woman piped up, "Shopping for rings? Yeah, that's when life really begins."
Now, she's not wrong, shopping for rings isn't exactly life and death, but it was a big deal to me--it marked a major change in the path of my life. Could she not identify with this? I believe she supports the institution of marriage and was once a young bride herself. So, would it have killed her to congratulate me? Wish me luck in my future marriage? Offer to support me in some non-offensive way?
I've endured a LOT more criticism now that I'm a mommy. I'm sure you know what it's like (if you're a mother)...snide, passive-aggressive comments about my and Richard's choices with Shirley Jean, you've all been there. "If you think you're blank now..." (I'm breaking out in hives just typing it.)
One memory that comes to mind was when SJ was just about six months old. I was joking with a "more experienced" sister-woman-friend about how wonderful it would be to sleep all the way through the night in a bed all to myself (a pipe dream that makes me salivate even now). A mother of four or five or seventeen whom I had never before met chimed in, "How many children do you have?" "Just one," I said. "Oh, poor you!" she rolled her eyes.
This is a relatively mild example...I've heard and read some downright nasty things about myself since Shirley was born, but the point is, REALLY???
Aren't we supposed to be building each other up? No, wait. Scratch that. Aren't YOU, "more experienced" sister-woman-friends supposed to be building ME up? Helping me to become a better wife and mother? Dare I say it: A Titus 2 Woman? Offering wisdom in a kind, non-humiliating way? The scrutiny and criticism I've endured, mostly from Christians, truly, is the reason I hardly blog any more. I know I'm not alone on this, and I'm probably (Edit: Probably?? I'm sure of it.) guilty of hurting someone's feelings inadvertently by trying to make a joke, etc., but I really do make a conscious effort to NOT put somebody to shame.
Speaking of shame, the truth is, I've enjoyed more praise and encouragement from my non-Christian friends than most of my "more experienced" sister-woman-friends. This isn't right.
I guess what I'm learning is that in ten or so years when I'm done bearing my four or five or seventeen children, I really don't want to be the kind of "more experienced" woman who is too proud to NOT say to a young wife and mother, "I hear you. I've been there. I'm praying for you. You're doing a GREAT job! How can I help?"

Slavery

Mommies don't get vacations.
They get to work harder...in the sun.

True Love

My Children

"Every night, I prayed for you, my special child. I prayed that your bones would be straight and your heart would be strong. But most of all, I prayed that someday you would love God."

-God Gave Us You

Book Review

American on Purpose by Craig Ferguson

Synopsis: The auto-biography / memoir (what's the difference anyway?) of Criag Ferguson, host of The Late Late Show. He starts by talking about his parents' lives in Glasgow at the end of World War II, and takes us all the way through his own birth, schooling, and career as a Scotsman. Intertwined through each fantastically depicted memory, he ruefully describes the way alcoholism affected his life.

Readability: Not hard to read at all. Very enjoyable, in fact. Be warned: this book contains colorful language and grown-up content relating to drugs, alcohol and sex. It was not gratuitous, though, and not necessarily written to shock, which I appreciate. It reads like a journal entry, though it is very intro-spective, well-thought-out, hilariously funny and at times very emotional. In short, I laughed, I cried, I empathized. The only down side is that there are a lot, A LOT of names to keep track of. Other than that, no complaints.

Predictability: Well, I knew going into it that Ferguson currently hosts a late night television show, so I wouldn't exactly call it a shocker. I learned a lot about Ferguson's life as a Scot, and why he became an American (which, incidentally, I did not see coming--I don't want to spoil anything for anyone, so if you want to know his reasons, shoot me an email.).

Couldn't Put it Down Factor: I really couldn't put it down. I thoroughly enjoyed it from word one. I don't know what I expected, but it is very well-written.

Recommend it?: I DO recommend it! It's like talking with a friend. Like I said, though, Ferguson is a true Scotsman and as such enjoys using the f-word and enjoyed (past-tense) whiskey and women.

Four out of five stars. Really loved it. Really, really.

(I just re-read this post. Could I gush any more??)

Merry Christmas!

Snow, snow, snow.

It's all I can think about.
We're now in a Winter Storm Warning.
This storm has the potential to wreak havoc on our Christmas. I'm sure I'm not alone here.

!!!!*&^$@#%!!!!

Silent Monks A-Singing

Santa

I don't think we're probably going to "Do Santa" at our house (though I'm not too stressed about it), but I have to say, the temptation to take Shirley to have her picture made with Santa at the mall is almost overwhelming, just because I'm pretty sure it will go SO BADLY.
You KNOW what I'm saying:

Now and Then

10 years ago

1.) How old were you? 17.
2.) Where did you go to school? Austin High School, Decatur, Alabama.
3.) Where did you work? Ha. At the carousel at the mall.
4.) Where did you live? On Ramona Drive in Decatur, AL.
5.) Where did you hang out? We had people over at our house a LOT. We also hung out at Books-A-Million. That's really all I remember.
6.) Did you wear glasses? Yes. Sigh.
7.) Who was your best friend(s)? Lauren. Ten years ago is when Lauren became my best friend.
8.) How many tattoos did you have? None. I was 17.
9.) How many piercings did you have? Ears.
10.) What car did you drive? A 1983 Volvo 240, four-speed. Her name was Daphne. She had no radio so we sang. We sang a lot.
11.) Had you been to a real party? Haha, no.
12.) Had your heart broken? I thought I had. Boy was I wrong.
13.) Single/Taken/Married/Divorced/Bitter: Single-ish.


5 years ago


1.) How old were you? 23
2.) Where did you go to school? University of Wisconsin-Eau Claire
3.) Where did you work? Five years ago today, I don't believe I had a job.
4.)Where did you live? Eau Claire, Wisconsin.
5.) Where did you hang out? Baldwin, Wisconsin. My fiance lived there. :)
6.) Did you wear glasses? Yes. I will forever wear glasses.
7.) Who was your best friend(s)? Jenna and Bia.
8.) Who was your crush? Richard.
9.) How many tattoos did you have? One.
10.) How many piercings did you have? Both ears and I think belly button. I was WILD!
11.) What car did you drive? Whatever Richard happened to own that week.
12.) Had you had your heart broken? Yessssssiree. Badly.
13.) Single/Taken/Married/Divorced/Bitter: About to be married.


December 2009


1.) How old are you? 2-ahem-8.
2.) Where do you work? I am in human relations and nutrition. I moonlight as a maid.
3.) Where do you live? Minnesota.
4.) Where do you hang out? The couch.
5.) Who is your best friend? I have a lot of best friends.
6.) Do you talk to your old friends? Many of them. There are a few who are missing, still, but I have not lost faith in Facebook. When you go to two high schools, it's easy to lose people. This is one of the greatest sadnesses in my life. Truly.
7.) How many piercings do you have? Two.
8.) How many tattoos? One.
9.) What kind of car do you have? I choose not to answer this. I still have some friends who think I'm cool.
10.) Has your heart been broken? It has. But it was only really applicable for the 5-year set of questions.
11.) Single/Taken/Married/Divorced/Bitter? Forever married.


Your turn (if you want)!
Naomi
Kristi
Lauren
Carla
Jessie
If anybody else wants to do it leave a comment so we are sure to come read yours!

75 Feet

If you've ever wondered how long your kitchen is, just lose control of the Reynolds Wrap.
As it turns out, my kitchen is NOT 75 feet long and as such I only had to re-roll about 20 feet of aluminum foil. Color me thankful.

Ode to a Toddler

My pre-two year old can not come play,

she has not got her way.

There are not enough cookies

what happened to all the nookies?

A hurricane in my house

she is never quiet as a mouse.

Publicly humiliating mama

who needs TV drama?

If I say no more Nemo

she gets all sad and emo.

Shirley Jean will see you at kindergarten

and not a moment before then.

Sainthood?

Gives new meaning to "Saint Nick."

Icky Christmas

Today I stopped at The Home Depot to pick up some air flow directors for the air vents in our FREEZING house. Basically, they're a little bandshell for your heat vent, that, incidentally have already made a big difference.
Anyway, on my way in the door, I stopped to smell some candles. As I was sniffing, a very normal-looking man cornered me against the display with his cart. He picked up a candle, sniffed it, and said, "You smell good."
My first inclination was to think that I must have misunderstood him, but when he kept staring at me with a dumb grin on his face not unlike THIS:













I knew I had not, afterall, misunderstood.
Without another word, I squeeeeeezed out of the tight spot he had me in (literally and figuratively), and made my purchases.
Icky. Icky Christmas. Not Merry.




For what it's worth, I'm still seeing spots from taking this picture.

Equations for Keeping House

Vaccuum Cleaner + Space Heater = Blown Fuse.*
Baby Hangers + Paper Bags = Barrell of Monkeys

*The bedroom clock (even though I have not reset it since I blew the fuse two days ago) is currently closer to real time than it was before the vaccuuming incident. Why bother resetting it? I can't see it from the bed anyway and Richard doesn't use it. Whatever.

Stuff that doesn't last forever that while you're in it seem endless:

-Broken hearts
-Puberty
-Trials
-Winter

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6

Book Review

The Lost Symbol by Dan Brown
Synopsis: Robert Langdon once again finds himself in the middle of a Symbologist's scavenger hunt where time is of the essence. This time, in our nation's capital.

Readability: Easy--very wordy, though. I found myself skipping entire paragraphs.
Predictability: I was surprised on this one--I didn't really know how it would all turn out. There were a couple twists and turns I didn't see coming, and a handful that I did.
Couldn't Put it Down Factor: As usual, Dan Brown delivered a real page-turner. Toward the end, it lost me, though. Once the mystery was solved, there were three or four more chapters to wrap up all kinds of loose ends. It was hard to stay awake for the finish.

Recommend it?: Well...that depends. In Dan Brown's other books, he has a lot to say mostly about the Catholic church. I feel like he works really hard doing his research so that nothing he says is absolutely WRONG, so it's hard to put your finger on it. Well...in The Lost Symbol, Brown has a lot to say about Christianity and religion as a whole. He's right on the money about a lot of things, but then he starts talking about how "God is in all of us," and that if we can each just elevate ourselves to one-ness, blah, blah, blah. He's missing the crucial point: As Christians, we have a savior. Remember? He missed it completely. Anyway, would I recommend this book? Sure...if you aren't offended by that sort of thing.

p.s. I felt like this was the most poorly-written book by Dan Brown yet. He repeats FULL SENTENCES from one page to another. What kind of editor did he have? Do they really think I'm so stupid that I can't follow the story? Really?

Two out of Five stars. I am disappointed.

Christmas Cutthroat

Christmas lights get ONE chance this year.
If they don't light up on the first try, they go straight in the trash.

Ruthless? Maybe.

I'm not messing around here. I learned my lesson last year.

Merry Christmas.

Any way the wind blows...