Wednesday, April 16, 2008

One by One

We have ants.
I realize that this statement combined with my last post make us look pretty disgusting. The thing is, I can NOT figure out where they are coming from. I am going to lose my mind. Here's the thing, though. These aren't your normal ants. These are STEALTH ants.
I see one, I remove my boob from the baby's mouth, grab a tissue, stand up to go after the ant, and it's gone. Disappeared. Vanished.
I sit down, put my boob back in the now angry baby's mouth, and it all starts over again.
It's like some sort of cosmic joke--a sick and twisted episode of Seinfeld. An episode where Jerry meets a new family named the Disgustingtons.
* * *
I tried to find an image of an ant on Google, but was so disgusted that I couldn't follow through. Now I swear they're crawling all over me. Bleck.

7 comments:

Mandi said...

Just let Pedro and Kitty finish them off.

Swampy-Rah said...

You are such a good writer.
All episodes of 'Seinfeld' are like that.
It was the most over-rated show on television; or was that 'Friends', I forget.

Kara Jo said...

Bleck. :) Oh, sweetie.

Katie R. said...

...sorry. I really thought ants came out closer to May? This is just too soon to start the battle with bugs that forget they live outside. Set out the traps that have the poison that's all enclosed and kill the suckers...sorry if that was a bit too strong. I'm just being honest.

Coffeegirl said...

Terro..best ant killer around. Put it out where the sightings are. I love the ones that have the liquid in the containers and all you do is open the little plastic thingie and there it is. It's a little more expensive, but sooo worth it. They take the poison back to their nest. Ahhhahhh. You'll get the last word alright.

-V- said...

Yep, Terro. They get in under our front door. (Ants are one thing I don't mind luring to their demise).

Jolene said...

ewwies! i'm sorry!! we've had that problem here before too. thank God for Terro!