Cephas

As we approach Easter, I find myself thinking about Peter and his denial of the Lord.
Luke 22:60-62 says: But Peter said, "Man, I do not know what you are talking about" And immediately, while he was still speaking, the rooster crowed. And the Lord turned and looked at Peter. And Peter remembered the saying of the Lord, how he had said to him, "Before the rooster crows today, you will deny me three times" And he went out and wept bitterly.
I'll bet he wept bitterly. Talk about an understatement. Can you imagine the weight carried in that look shared between Peter and Jesus? Poor, poor Peter. How humiliating. How disappointing. How crushing. They were friends, and Jesus even knew Peter would deny him, but Peter didn't believe it. Ye he denied the Lord any way.
Are we really so different?
My favorite thing about this story is the sweet forgiveness Peter receives later in John 21. Some of the disciples are out fishing when they realize Jesus is talking to them from the shore. Peter says, "It is the Lord!" and throws himself in the water to swim to meet Jesus standing on the shore 100 yards away. I love it. I LOVE that part. His denial didn't matter--all that mattered was the resurrected Lord waiting for him on the shore and he could. not. get. there. fast enough.
What kind of private conversation must they have had while they waited for the others to drag the net full of fish to shore? Did Peter beg for forgiveness? Did he throw himeslf at Jesus' feet? Did he embrace his friend? Did they weep? Did they laugh?
What kind of love is this, that Peter can deny the Lord and then be embraced by him as a friend a few days later?
And again, I ask, are we so different?
Will Jesus turn us away if we go running to him? Or will he wait for us--even though we have denied him in the face of his own humiliation?
Jesus said to [Thomas], "I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. If you had known me, you would have known my Father also. From now on you do know him and have seen him." (John 14:6-7)
Anyway...all this is to say: I bet Peter really gets down at the Resurrection celebration in heaven.

Hate.

I've been thinking about hate lately. In fact, I asked God to deliver me from hating someone recently. I believe that he has and will, but I also hope I can let it go. So, while I'm thinking about it, I have to ask...
Who do you hate, gentle reader?
Who hates you?
Is there a difference?
(For me, there is no difference.)
Hate can spring up so quickly from something that seems so small...envy, anger, frustration...you name it. Sometimes even the tiniest seed of irritation can grow into a giant cactus in the middle of our flower garden. Nothing pushes me closer to the brink of hatred like unloading the dishwasher after someone else has loaded it. I'm not kidding. Ask me about it--I'll tell you some time.
But here's the thing--and I hope this knocks your socks off, the way it did mine--we don't have the right to hate each other. God doesn't give us that right. The only one with the power to judge is the Lord. Not me. And who am I to hate someone God loves dearly as his own? Can I claim his love--to be loved as his beloved, chosen child while hating someone all the while? Surely hating while being God's beloved are incongruous. 1 John 4:10 says, "In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins." We are loved. Loved. Loved. The Bible is very clear on this. This is just one example of God's love for us among MANY. If you don't believe me, go to ebible.com and type in the word love.
Anyway, back to hate. Let me lay this one from Exodus 23:4 on ya, "If you see the donkey of one who hates you lying down under its burden, you shall refrain from leaving him with it; you shall rescue it with him."
I believe what the metaphor is pointing at here is the idea that if someone who hates you is burdened or in jeopardy, you shall rescue them. If you are able to help, you may not turn away. In this way, we are bound to those we hate! Imagine that. We are already bound to them in our hearts...carrying around the burden of our hatred, but we are bound by Christ's love to help them.
What does it do to our hearts if we unburden the ones who hate us? Since, really, there is no difference between being hated and hating (at least for me. If you are able to make a distinction, you are a better man or woman than I), if we turn around and help those that we hate, what happens?
Now, I suppose there are circumstances where this won't happen or isn't possible. But I propose that there are situations where it IS possible. Where it can happen.
So, go for it. I encourage you to, "Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you." Luke 6:27-28.
I'm going to give it my honest-to-goodness best shot, and with God's grace maybe I will be able to let go of my hate and become more like him in the process.
Let me know how it works out.

Santa and Jesus

Erin: It's fun to talk about Santa, isn't it?
Shirley: YEAH!
E: Does Santa bring toys to good or bad children?
SJ: Only GOOD kids.
E: What happens if you are naughty?
SJ: [silence.]
E: Do naughty kids get toys?
SJ: Nooooo.
E: You know what's special about Jesus?
SJ: He's REAL!
E: Yeah! He's real! And you know what else? You don't have to be good to receive his gifts! Jesus gives his gift to anyone who wants it.
SJ: Ok, Mom.

-a few minutes later-

SJ: Mom? What about reindeer?

Baby Dedication

Baby Richard is going to be publically dedicated to God at our church on Sunday morning, July 18, 2010 during the 10:30 service. We would be honored if you would join us for this very special service.

Christ is Risen!

Dance for Jesus

For those of you who still visit my blog (I just typed bog by accident. Ironic? I think not.), I've been missing for a while because my Great-Grandmother, Helga, is dying. I've spent the week riding up there with my dad to sit by her bed and offer help where I can.
Last night it struck me: waiting for a loved one to die is not unlike waiting for your best friend to have a baby.
It's longer than you expect it to be, arduous, tedious and stressful.
If you are very, very blessed, though, both end in a homecoming and hopefully, a celebration.

Feed My Starving Children

Alicia and I were the only ones willing to wear our hairnets for the photo. I think we look good!

Today I had the privilege of going to Feed My Starving Children in Coon Rapids, Minnesota to pack meals with the gals from my Bible study to send to Haiti. Together with the approximately 100 people there, we packed 18,900+ meals to send to Haiti, and all in under two hours!
The meals consist of chicken flavoring (that is actually vegetarian), freeze dried vegetables, soy protein and rice. The meals have important vitamins and minerals that starving children have no other way to get. The meals don't look all that appealing, but we got to sample some and it actually didn't taste too bad.
This is exactly the same thing we did at Faith Community Church this summer to send meals to Serve India.* (Different organization, same concept. I can't find a link for them...can anyone help?)
It was such a joy and a humbling experience to make meals for families and children who may not know from where their next meal is coming.
If you want to help pack meals to go to Haiti, please feel free to visit FMSC's website. They told us that they have lots of help right now because Haiti is in the headlines every day, but things will probably slow down later this summer, even though the need won't disappear. FMSC is a Christian group that is already well-established in Haiti. They told us that before the earthquake they had sent something like 3 million meals to Haiti and since the earthquake they've sent 3 million more. Before March 1, they intend to send 5 million more meals into Haiti. Isn't that awesome?!? Other countries who have been promised meals from FMSC are willing to postpone their shipments so that Haiti can have what they need right now, because the need is so great.

*Incidentally, the meals we made to go to India in August are currently "held up" by the government and have not yet made it to the families who desperately need them. If it crosses your mind, please pray both for the meals that are on their way to India and Haiti and the children and families who will eat them.

Picking Teams

My Great-Uncle, Bud, died last week. He was a good friend of my grandfather, who died in 2004. They were both very active in sports and loved spending time together laughing and goofing around, and both of them became less and less active as their illnesses took their health, though neither of them let this get in the way of their joy for living for the Lord.
We went to the funeral this morning, and Mom and I simultaneously had the same thought:
Grandpa and Bud are playing together right now.
I said, "They're playing basketball."
Mom said, "They're playing softball."
Together we said, "They're playing CARDS!"
We laughed and Mom said, "They're picking teams in heaven right now!"
It's wonderful to think of their new bodies, their complete spirits, their wholeness with God.
The funeral was a very nice memorial to Bud and I was very touched.
There are two kinds of funerals. Today was the good kind.

"He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away." Revelation 21:4

My View of Hell

This weekend, I was reminded that when Christ died (before he rose again), he spent three days in hell. (I didn't really forget, I guess I just hadn't thought about it in a while.)

My view of hell is not necessarily one of fire and brimstone, but of total separation from God. It is a desolate and joyless place, with no hope, no second chances and none of the love that we so readily take for granted. Here, on Earth, we have the opportunity to be near God, even if we don't embrace him as our savior. We easily forget that he is always near, and in hell, he will not be in the wind, a song or in our neighbor's hearts.

Christ went from perfect and constant communion with God to partial communion with God when he was born as a human to absolute separation from God in the span of 30-odd short years.

When Jesus was 9 months old, he was learning to crawl, blowing raspberries, pulling off his socks, testing out his new teeth, doing face-plants on the kitchen floor and "helping" his mama with laundry.

Thirty years later, he hung on the cross.

These are the things Mary thought about. She felt his kicks in her womb, and then watched him die for her own sins.

I'm just saying.

Today I am thinking about 2 Peter, Chapter 2.

A Good Day

So far, today has been a very good day--and it's only half over!

At the Mall of America, the Christian Fiction Writers Association had a book signing. There were 120 Christian Fiction Writers there, among whom was one of my favorite authors, Tosca Lee.

Tosca is a friend of my Aunt Kris, and she and I have exchanged email on several occasions, but I had not yet had the chance to meet her. She wrote a book last year called Demon: a Memoir, that stands alone in the relatively sucky world of Christian Fiction. It was really fun to get to meet her because, like I said, she stands out. If I were to write a book, I would want it to be on the edge and make people think the way Tosca's does. Too many Christian books are sugary sweet and don't deal with real issues and spiritual battle. Tosca is not afraid to go there, which I greatly appreciate.

I have not yet written a review on Demon, but I think I will in the near future. It is up for the AFCW 2008 Book of the Year. Good luck, Tosca!

I also got to meet John B. Olson who was one of the writers for Ben Stein's Expelled that came out earlier this year in theaters. Verrrry cool.

True statement.

Vee Bee Ess

Vacation Bible School starts tomorrow morning.

I L.O.V.E. VBS. Love.

I am so excited.

If you think of us, please pray for us. Pray that God would use me and alllllll the other volunteers for His glory in these kids lives. Please pray, also that lives would be changed, that God's spirit would be in every exciting detail, and that our focus will remain on Him.

Thank you, Lord, for the opportunity to serve You in this way.

Please make avery action, word and moment count.

Amen.

July 19

Next week on July 19, during the 6:00 service at Faith Community Church in Hudson, we are having Shirley Jean publically dedicated to God.

We would love it if you were there to share in our joy.

Please join us in the community room after the church service for an hour of fellowship and to kiss the baby!

Hope to see you there, my blogfriends.

Fear (and a little Loathing)

It's pretty well known that Satan will attack us where he knows we are weakest, right?
For some reason, my weakenesses are almost always fear-based.
If I get really angry, sad, let myself be overcome with worry, or fall down in general, I can usually trace my failure back to some root fear that I cannot EVER seem to escape.
Well, without going into the gory details, I have been having some very serious issues with emotionally paralyzing fear. You know the kind? The kind that stops you mid-breath and makes you question whether or not you can continue INHALING?
Well, until about an hour ago, Satan had me so confused by fear that once I got over one particular fear (or so I thought), he had another one waiting for me on the other side of the bathroom door. Literally.
I prayed and cried with Richard about it, and then came upstairs to check the blogs and read My Utmost for His Highest.
Once again, Chambers (http://www.rbc.org/utmost/index.php) proves to be proufound. (Thank you, God for using this man's writing so eloquently in my life.)
Chambers writes,
"I [...] have to build my thinking patiently to bring it into perfect harmony with my Lord. God will not make me think like Jesus— I have to do it myself. I have to bring 'every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ' (2 Corinthians 10:5). 'Abide in Me'— in intellectual matters, in money matters, in every one of the matters that make human life what it is."
Oh, there is so much to talk about here!
The most important part to me, tonight at 1:36am?
I AM RESPONSIBLE FOR MY OWN FEARFUL THOUGHTS!!
I can ask God to help me remove specific images from my mind, but it's MY responsibility, not HIS, to focus on Godly things. This, to me, means that I need to trust God in the areas that I worry about (hel-LO! Aren't fear and WORRY essentially one in the same??)
Is focusing on my fear Godly?
2 Chorinthians 10:5 in its entirety says, "We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." (ebible.com)
Now look at the way I've been thinking about it:
"We demolish arguments [posed by Satan against our ultimate goal of glorifying God IN. ALL. THINGS.] and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of [thoughts, focus on] God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ [ERIN!!! GOD DOESN'T WANT YOUR THOUGHTS TO BE TAKEN UP BY FEAR. THAT IS NOT 'OBEDIENT TO CHRIST.']
God is so faithful to us when we cry out to Him.
I just had to share.

I love when Christians have a sense of humor!

Christ is Risen, Indeed!

Happy Easter, everyone. Richard and I both agree--our salvation means so much more to each of us now that we have a daughter to share eternity with.

Blessings on you and yours on this day that we celebrate Christ's resurrection and our acceptance into His eternal family.

p.s. I feel a little guilty about dressing my daughter in an Easter Bunny outfit, but it's hard to find a sleeper that has the stone rolled away on it.

I'm just saying.

I can't believe she's finally here!

Welcome to the world,

Natalie Ann Sorenson!

Born February 1, 2008 at 2:11am

Weighing 6 pounds, 14 ounces and measuring 19.5 inches long.

She has more BLACK hair than her daddy!

We are thrilled at your arrival, little girl. I will pray for you and love you and teach you as long as I can. I can't wait to see you grow into a Godly woman, wife and mother.

I love you already!

*I forgot my camera at home when we went to visit, so I will have to post pictures later!

Why or What?

I dreamt two nights ago that one of my co-workers asked me either, "Why are you a Christian, Erin?" or "What kind of a Christian are you, Erin?"
I couldn't remember which question she asked as soon as I woke up.
Either way, it troubled me.
Oswald Chambers asks, "Has there been a point in your life which you now mark as your last day? Is there a place in your life to which you go back in memory with humility and overwhelming gratitude, so that you can honestly proclaim, 'Yes, it was then, at my 'white funeral,’ that I made an agreement with God.'"
My last day came in 1998. I had given my life to Christ in our basement on Vine Street at the age of five, and I earnestly believe that I was filled with the Holy Spirit at that time. I do not believe that I began the path to sanctification until 1998, one day in my bedroom in Alabama. The details are not important, but it happened. *Upon further thought, that's a silly thing to say. Of course, I was on the path to sanctification. I don't think I understood its importance until that day in Alabama.
Shortly thereafter, God proved his love to me by opening my eyes (literally) to a spiritual realm beyond my comprehension...and protecting me from it.
Chambers goes on to write,

When we talk about the call of God, we often forget the most important thing, namely, the nature of Him who calls [...] The call is the expression of the nature of the One who calls, and we can only recognize the call if that same nature is in us. The call of God is the expression of God’s nature, not ours. God providentially weaves the threads of His call through our lives, and only we can distinguish them. It is the threading of God’s voice directly to us over a certain concern, and it is useless to seek another person’s opinion of it.
[...]
The call of God is not a reflection of my nature; my personal desires and temperament are of no consideration. As long as I dwell on my own qualities and traits and think about what I am suited for, I will never hear the call of God. [...] The majority of us cannot hear anything but ourselves. And we cannot hear anything God says. But to be brought to the place where we can hear the call of God is to be profoundly changed.

I can see where God has woven the threads of His call through my life from the age of five, to seventeen, to my marriage at 23, and into the growth He has insisted upon in the last eight months as I prepare for my baby.
Over the past year, I've been continually asking..."Who am I in Christ?"
The bottom line? If you ask, God will answer you. It hurts, and it sucks, and it's intensely emotional, but it seems to be satisfying, comforting and RIGHT...I think. I'll let you know.

The Most Beautiful

In all the stress and running of the Christmas Season, I sometimes have trouble remembering to CELEBRATE the birth of our savior.
I love this song because it so often applies to my daily attitude (even in non-Christmas seasons).
Take a second to read it.

I Heard the Bells
I heard the bells on Christmas day
Their old familiar carols play,
And wild and sweet the words repeat
Of peace on earth, good will to men.

And thought how, as the day had come,
The belfries of all Christendom
Had rolled along the unbroken song
Of peace on earth, good will to men.

Till ringing, singing on its way
The world revolved from night to day,
A voice, a chime, a chant sublime
Of peace on earth, good will to men.

And in despair I bowed my head
“There is no peace on earth,” I said,
“For hate is strong and mocks the song
Of peace on earth, good will to men.”

Then pealed the bells more loud and deep:
“God is not dead, nor doth He sleep;
The wrong shall fail, the right prevail
With peace on earth, good will to men.”

-Henry W. Longfellow, 1864

This Christmas Hymn was written during the Civil War, though seems so pertinent to our lives today, especially the last two stanzas. No matter what: God is not dead, nor does he sleep! I find this very reassuring and encouraging.
An updated version of the song is on the MercyMe Christmas Album. "The Christmas Sessions." I highly recommend it. Click here to go listen to the song. I think the link will work.
Confession: I secretly listen to this song all year.
Merry Christmas, friends.

Do NOT collect $200

I'm having one of those days where I doubt my tenacity, courage and stamina in this to-each-his-own race to the finish. Does the line, "I can do all things through Christ Jesus who strengthens me," ever make you shake your head in frustration?
WE are not supposed to see life this way. WE are supposed to be filled with the Holy Spirit and thereby shine His light to the world. Do you think there is a "Get out of jail FREE" card for Grace?
Do you think God ever says, "You know what? You did your best. This really is an impossible situation. You don't have to keep going. Here. Here's a new handbag."
Is there a line, a limit? Do we ever reach a point in the "race," where we've done enough and can retire?
Don't answer that.
But really. What does God think? Does He think I'm doing a good job? Does He think I'm doing my best? Is He proud of me?
Last night, Dad read to me (paraphrased), "All we have to do is proclaim the salvation of Jesus Christ and the rest will follow. If we do that, the listener will never be the same, regardless of their choice."
I believe this.
But what about me?
It all comes down to one thing: Who am I in Christ?
How the [bleep] do I know?
Really? Who AM I in Christ? Do we ever really know?
Do you know?
Do you know who you are in Christ?
While I'm at it, do any of YOU know who I am in Christ? Let me know if you have some ideas. I'm at a loss.