I'm tired of the way we talk to each other. I'm tired of communication breakdowns all because of our inability to just say what we mean.
Here are some ideas:
1. Take responsibility for the things that come out of your mouth.
2. Do what you say you are going to do.
3. In other words, mean what you say, and say what you mean.
4. Tell the truth. (See #1)
5. Don't keep secrets.
6. Keep secrets that no one needs to hear. (See #1)
7. Don't tell me what you think I want to hear and then change your mind. (See #1)
8. Think about what you say before you say it (see #1).
9. Don't get mad at me for not understanding you. (Try #1, #8, and #13 for starters.)
10. If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.
11. Be encouraging.
12. Apologize when necessary. (See #1)
13. Don't jump to conclusions. (See #9)
Our tongues and typing fingers is/are a dangerous weapon (especially mine). Use them carefully. I don't claim to be very good at this, but I'm tired of confusing/dishonest conversation that leads to doubts and then ill-feelings. On my part OR yours.
Perhaps I am extra-sensitive to this sort of thing because I'm so aware of my own faults, but lately, I feel very beat up and, well, thrashed, by people's words. I just thought I'd say something.
I did a little e-bible search on tongues and found that James 3:8 says, "But no man can tame the tongue. It is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison." Amen, James. There are a lot more verses on the tongue being damned to hell. Humbling, indeed. Just because James says no man can tame his tongue, doesn't mean we shouldn't try. Do a little search on your own. Let me know what you find.
8 comments:
How ironic that yesterday I blogged about being a liar. I just realized that.
I was going to comment that same thing, but figured I'd better hold my tongue.
My darling, take another look at item 10. How does that sink with item 1 and several others. Your point is well made that we are all liars. But how can we clear the air if we live by #10? Just heard a great sermon on our biblical responsibility to resolve conflict. He referred to #10 as "Nebraska Nice." Perhaps in your case it's just Midwestern Nice. His point was that #10 doesn't really solve anything. Sometimes you have to say the hard thing, but only if you're willing to own it. (See #1.)
Don't mean to thrash the writer of the blog, but had to share the thoughts you provoked. And isn't that the point of a blog, to provoke thoughtful dialogue?
Love, Aunt Kris
Wrong form of the word 'sync' in my comment. My apologies to the wordsmiths among you. You may also note that I started a sentence with the word 'and'. Once again, I should have proofed prior to publication. K
Was it me? If so, I totally #12.
I see your point. It's a gray area, though, because we can't go around saying everything that comes into our heads. My main point was #1. Take responsibility for what you say. I see #10 as expounding on #8--think about what comes out of your mouth. Ask yourself, "Do I need to say [mean thing]?" "Am I helping the situation?" Once again I must reiterate, I don't claim to even be remotely good at any of the things on my list. I will, however, try to start applying them in my daily life.
Kristi, it wasn't you.
Does this have anything to do with me calling you stupid? I didn't mean it. I do own it. I sincerely apologize. Or could it be the ugly betty comment in the text message last night? You know, if you would just say what you mean, you would feel better and we would know who you are upset with. At least give us a hint...MALE or female? lovemom
HEY! Everyone who reads Erin's blogs!!! Tell her which ones are your favorites. She needs to sumbit some writing. The ad was looking for young women writers who can write about subjects that interest young women, anything goes. Give her your input and encourage her to get busy. She needs a wider audience for her writing. Her loving mother.
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